Why do we hate ourselves?

Let’s face it, we all have looked out ourselves in the mirror and criticized ourselves. We don’t like our weight, height, nose, legs, acne, the list goes on. We would NEVER say those things to others, so why do we think it’s ok to say it to ourselves. We look at ourselves and tear every little bit of us apart until we are just a bunch of shreds that have no self confidence or love of the way we are.


Let’s go back to the root of it. When we were young, we didn’t criticize ourselves in that way. As children we simply enjoyed ourselves. It wasn’t until someone pointed out a flaw or we were shown people who appeared to not have flaws. It wasn’t until we compared ourselves to others that we decided we didn’t like ourselves. The world has influenced us to where it is almost a necessity to hate ourselves and the way we look. Do we really all want to look the same?


I have definitely had my share of problems with my weight, confidence and dieting but it is something I am newly working on. The other day I was in a dance class and I saw myself in the mirror. Normally, I try not to spend much time in front of the mirrors out of hope that this will help me criticize myself less. As I looked at myself I began to pick myself apart. I thought my legs looked to large and I found myself comparing myself to others in the class. As I thought about this later I felt ashamed of my thoughts.


First of all, I was in a dance class and those legs that I thought were too muscular were allowing me to dance and be strong. I was able to jump and spin because of my legs. People experience joy and happiness because I am able to dance because of those legs. I also have never considered that some people don’t have legs. Yes, I know that sounds kind of silly but it’s true. Someone would love to have your legs, however long, short, skinny, large, whatever they are.


I read something the other day that stuck with me. God created each one of us. We are his master pieces. Who are we to hate God’s artwork because to him, you are beautiful. God didn’t make you so that you would impress people with your skinniness, he made you so that you could follow him and do great things. Our outward appearance doesn’t matter, it is who we are that truly matters.

Psalms 139:14 says : I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

God did the incredible thing of making you. You knew and understood this once but sadly our world has distorted that image. We don’t wear clothes because we think they make us look fat, we care so much about what others (who don’t even matter) think about us.

With all the time we spend hating ourselves and comparing ourselves to others we could have changed the world for the good.

So, what can you do to love yourself more?

positive thoughts – Our thoughts are so powerful. I know it’s hard, but try to control your thoughts and fill them with positive things instead. Come up with a simple saying like, I love myself, and respect that in your head when you can. Write it down and put it on your mirror, make it your phone wallpaper.

weight – Your weight doesn’t matter. Try to focus on your health but don’t push it. Try to eat healthy just to be kind to your body but don’t weigh yourself, don’t hate yourself if you eat junk food. Also, don’t force yourself to workout because that will make you hate it. Work out when you feel like it and for the right reasons.

strength – Think about the things that you love about yourself. You don’t have to even fully believe them, but tell yourself what they are. Eventually, the things that you hated about yourself will become what you love.

big picture – Think big picture and focus on that. Do you want to look back on your life and only remember how much you hated yourself. I don’t know about you but I would much rather be proud of my character and my memories of adventure. Do you want your kids to hear about how you starved yourself because you thought you weren’t good enough for the world?

I wanted to share these thoughts with you out of hope that it might help someone struggling with this. Feel free to let me know your thoughts on the subject down below. Thank you for reading 🙂



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